All-Parties Peace Conference

[Bergenheim]

Eldgarten Conference Centre, Midweis, January 4th, 2018

The early January snows were slowly beginning to clear, replaced by biting, hard wind and bleak, grey skies. The roads of the Capital were lined with filthy slush, the Municipal street cleaners having worked tirelessly to clear and salt the roads to maintain easy traffic flow.

Normally, the city mostly slumbered in January, wrapped up warm with mugs of hot spiced chocolate(Bergenheim* quality, naturally) and wearing thick, knitted sweaters. But the Crisis had disrupted the usual routine of the clockwork city, and now the roads were jammed with traffic, plans and lives and policies all thrown into chaos.

The Centre itself was the construction of generous private benefactors, to aid the cause of peace, and give foreign dignitaries somewhere better than stuffy, 19th century manorhomes to stay while discussing important political matters.

Now, every room and space was booked up. Private security, normally so ubiquitous, had been unceremoniously replaced with plain-clothes members of the Republican Guard, an elite parade regiment that answered directly to the Archchancellor, bypassing Lotti's usual authority.

The General was not here, anyway. Sigrid Vogt stood, Angela and Vice-Chancellor Kessler at her sides, waiting in immaculate suits, though Angela's suit had rather more room for her bust.

Soon, the first delegates would arrive, and be greeted by a plaza cleared of the plebian, and steered to a sumptious, all-you-can-eat Buffet put on by the very best chefs, some hired from Bourgogne. The heating was cranked way up, the food was sumptious, and the hotel rooms where they would be staying even had free wi-fi.

There was only one small problem.

Trivodnia, the Guest of Honour, and one of the key players in all of this, wasn't coming.

Sigrid maintained a fixed grin, but the flexing of her hands in her tight gloves gave away her true feelings.

Angela was nervous, but privately excited about the whole thing. Finally, a chance to shine! In public too! Let them think her just a pretty face and a nice rack. She could play poker with the best of them.

And, privately, she suspected, if the main player wasn't coming, then that would leave the conference to play a lot of poker....

 

[Crotobaltislavonia]

Jedreck had been out of the country at a conference when the latest crisis at home had exploded. And as events had unfolded, he has been left to languish on the sidelines overseas. The Foreign Minister had still not been home. Instead, he had been ordered directly to Bergenheim post-haste to attend this peace conference without a clue as to what kind of peace his boss wanted.

The Foreign Minister had no more time for his private thoughts. The car was pulling up. Someone opened the door and Jedreck stepped out into the Plaza. He could see a trio of dignitaries waiting.

Time to go to work, Jedreck thought to himself as he flashed a smile and went to greet his hosts.

 

[Elben]

Schlabrendorff had of course seen the files on the Bergenheim principals he would be meeting. Face shots, bios, spouses and children. Vogt and Kessler and Angela...

The car stopped and the door opened. The count climbed out and was immediately glad he had worn his great coat, even for the short distance between the car and the entrance. Behind him came an aide bearing his briefcase and a portable typewriter. An internal bulletin sent around by Elben's intelligence agency on Van Eck phreaking had led to Schlabrendorff swearing off all manner of electronic devices when abroad, especially in situations like this one where he expected real work to be done.

Coat handled off, preliminaries completed, the minister and his aide looked ahead and he saw Jedreck ahead. "Let's see if he makes eyes with the girl again..." The aide smiled at the idea floated by his boss.

 

[Tyonic Confederacy]

Ambassador Antonia Shulte, having resided in Bergenheim for some time now, knew that the distance between her office and the initial meeting place was not far at all. Having visited there from time to time to enjoy a nice meal there, she had grown accustomed to walking that she almost forgot to arrive in a car. Stepping into the car she ran through the notes on the officials coming and more but her mind drifting towards the delicious meal that awaited her, and she did not have to wait long. Stepping out in a blue business dress she walked briskly towards the dignitaries waiting to greet her.

 

[Rheinbund]

Priv. Doz. Dr. Norbert Schmelzer was a man with quite some experience on the international stage, but also with academic experience. After absolving his study International Law, he became a "Doktorand" as it was called in Eiffelland: Somebody who worked at the university as a junior staff member with the goal to obtain a Ph.D. After he received his Ph.D., he worked a couple of years at a University before he switched to a diplomatic career. After a few posts abroad (the last one as ambassador), he returned to the University. Currently he was a lecturer at the Katholische Universität Köln. And he was asked again on a diplomatic mission.

Schmelzer was a very precise man who always made sure that his clothing was impeccable. The suits he wore, were grey, not too dark but certainly not too bright. His shoes were black and shined. He always wore a white shirt, but every day another white shirt. He also wore a different suit and different shoes each day. Currently he was a 1.85 m tall 55 year old man, with short greying hair, and without a belly. Indeed, he was very precise, but his approach of problems was always relaxed. Von Seydewitz had chosen the man to represent Eiffelland wisely.

After having stepped out of the Raimer R600 of the embassy and entered the building where the conference would be held, he walked to Archchancellor Vogt and the people forming the reception committee and greeted them.

 

[Kadikistani Union]

First Deputy Commissar for External Affairs Ivica Prepurkovic wasn't the most high ranking foreign official that the Kadikistani Union had to offer, that honour was bestowed upon the otherwise engaged People's Commissar Petar Kujundzic. Nevertheless First Deputy Commissar was Kujundzic's right hand and the second most important Party functionary in the People's Commissariat for External Affairs. The reason Ivar had not sent their prime figures was because the nation was showered with congresses and international negotiations, not limited to the crisis in Crotobaltislavonia. The latter a Kadikistani ally with strong cultural ties to the dominant Kadiki ethnic group and a nation which the Union and the Rurikgrad Pact at large could not afford to lose to the Trier Concordat.

Prepurkovic, unlike most Kadikistani diplomats, was a civilian. No grand military uniform full of decorations, but a tailor-made suit was how Prepurkovic showed himself being among the last to arrive. First Deputy Commissar was a rational man schooled in the arts of diplomacy by the ever pragmatic Kujundzic. He knew he wouldn't be part of the most important talks, those simultaneously taking place discretely at various locations, but nevertheless he was determined to make his mark on solving the Crotobaltislavonian Crisis. Walking out of his

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, flanked by his entourage of aides and a security detail, Prepurkovic went inside and graciously greeted their host. It was know Trivodnia wouldn't be partaking in this conference, making the room for results deteriorate, but at least Kadikistan would show its goodwill to the world.

 

[Bergenheim]

The Conference proceded as smoothly as Bergenheim's well-oiled clocks, and the Archchancellor took care to divide her time as equally as she fairly could between the visiting delegates and her own government's representatives.

Despite the lavish dining, the sumptuous surroundings, and the provision of live musical entertainment- all carefully supervised by an army of bureaucrats and discrete state-funded security, of course- it was hard not to conclude that the Eldgarten All-Parties Peace Conference was something of an empty affair.

Even behind her well-practiced smile, Vogt knew that without Trivodnia, the most that could be accomplished here was some sort of General Statement, A Proclamation for Regional Order or some such thing.

And so, carefully bringing the delegates to the conference table, she set out what their business here would be, in terms that would allow them to actually do something, give her some measure of international recognition, and justify the expense of all of this to the taxpayer. Hopefully.


"Esteemed Delegates, I thank you all for your patience, and your presence, once again." She began.

"Today, our task is simple. We must decide amongst ourselves, as representatives of the concerned parties and the Gallo-Germania region in general, upon the matter in hand. While we may not be able to directly resolve the...tensions between Trivodnia and her neighbours, I propose that we instead agree upon an International Proclamation. That we, together, work out a set of principles, a base-line for peace and order that would be mutually satisfactory, with regards not just to Crotobaltislavonia but the maintenance of good order in the region in general. Lacking a more...established International Forum, I hope that these talks will serve not just as a way to express our feelings as nations about the crisis, but also provide a precedent for a swifter, more united response against such actions of chaos in the future."

 

[Crotobaltislavonia]

Jedreck nodded at the Bergenheimer's words. When she was finished, Jedreck stood and put as much gravity into his words as he could muster.

"Yes, a shame that the ring-leader of the coup that tried to topple my country's Dear Leader has decided not to attended. But understandable. The Yiddish Free State knows its guilt. It knows it failed in its foolhardy attempt to install General Radek as a puppet. And now the Free State's only recourse is to hide behind accusations of anti-Yiddism and Kadikistani aggression.

"Brothers and Sisters of Europe, the task at hand is not so simple. It is full of risk and hardship! it is The Dear Leader's position that before peace can be achieved, before a final settlement can be agreed upon, the Yiddish Question must be resolved in Trivodnia! The problem is this other people who live amongst us, who refuse to assimilate while maintaining their own values and agendas! It is The Dear Leader's position that there must be a true Yiddish Free State in the so-called Trivodnia, where all of the Yiddish-faith may live amongst themselves and away from the rest of us. The question is, does Europe have the will to make this happen? Or will we continue to be played against each other like pawns on a chessboard?

"Thank you."

 

[Elben]

Schlabrendorff knew what his master was doing in Gunnland. Vogt's suggestions for the region were not in the same direction as the way Elben was already going. More talk, just like in Kashtan! Then Jedreck got up. The Elbener was already a bit disappointed that Jedreck and Angela had not greeted each other at the reception with more zest. Now the man himself from Crotobaltislavonia began to speak...

Oh. My. God.

 

[Rheinbund]

Dr. Norbert Schmelzer was quite shocked by Jedreck's words. Pushing all Jews to Trivodnia? But why? He decided to make clear what he thought of Jedreck's suggestion to shift all the Jews in the region to Trivodnia.

"Ladies, Gentlemen, let me remind you of the fact that Trivodnia is already for a large part a Jewish state. It cannot be turned into a 100% Jewish state, however, because there is a large non-Jewish minority in that country. That minority will not accept it if Trivodnia becomes a 100% Jewish state. Or should we move the non-Jewish minority out of Trivodnia? Such decisions will disrupt the lives of too many people, apart from the enormous logistic problems I see. Mind you, we would have to relocate millions of people through Gallo-Germania. My Government will never agree to such a plan. Furthermore, I don't understand why the Jews in Crotobaltislavonia constitute a problem. Eiffelland has a Jewish community of about 2.5 million people. Those people have their synagogues and indeed tend to form their own communities in the larger cities, but apart from that they contribute to the Eiffellandian society to the same extent as the non-Jewish people, among others by paying taxes. We don't see a reason to expel the Eiffellandian Jews out of the country, and won't do so. Trivodnia already functions as a home-country for the Jews, but we will not cooperate with a Europe-wide deportation of Jews to Trivodnia."

Then Schmelzer's handy produced a slight beep, only hearable to Schmelzer himself.

"Please excuse me, ladies and gentlemen." Schmelzer took his handy, a light device in firm lines from the Eiffellandian computer brand Nichsdorf, out of his pocket. He had received an SMS message from Chancellor Von Seydewitz: "Staatstag and Staatsrat accept helping Trivodnia with refugee problem and taking up refugees from Crotobaltislavonia."

"By the way, Mr. Jedreck, I understood that quite a lot of people wish to flee from your country, for whichever reason. I just received a message from my Government that we will assist Trivodnia with receiving those people. Furthermore, we will give some of them, up to 50,000 people, a home in Eiffelland."

 

[Tyonic Confederacy]

Things were going great until Jedreck had opened his mouth, the sheer infringement on peoples lives is impossible under most governments present here (Except a very select few.) Eiffeland was the first to voice its opposition to what Jedreck said, and hit it quite spot on. But there were some issues that Ambassador Shulte had with what he said, specifically the rhetoric.

"The Yiddish are not the problem, following that kind of rhetoric has lead to horrible problems in times past. Thousands of people were murdered because of rhetoric like that within my own country, this is not a place for radical moves. May I suggest we leave such rhetoric outside, where it belongs to achieve what we came here for?"

She had lost family to such rhetoric in the 1950's and it struck a nerve that the same was happening to others. She was going to make sure that as little as he wants gets into this deal, out of the safety of Yiddish worldwide.

 

[Crotobaltislavonia]

Jedreck stood again, holding up his hands and gesturing for calm.

"Believe me, Brothers and Sisters, Crotobaltislavonia has no desire to upturn the lives of so many across Europe. We are only thinking of their long-term best interests. Which is why I think it's best if the refugees remain where they are for the time being while Crotobaltislavonia recovers. I'm sure The Dear Leader would agree."

The Minister turned to Dr. Schmelzer. "Crotobaltislavonia accepts your generous offer to provide a home for our people. You truly have my country's best interests at heart."

 

[Bergenheim]

Vogt's face was frozen in a fixed grin, Her hand clenching and unclenching as Jedreck's...event unfolded before her. Zweigler, at Vogt's side, shot her opposite a look of profound, heart-melting disappointment, like a kitten who has learned they are not going to be fed tonight.

Kessler, the Vice-Archchancellor simply smirked, and held his own council.

Seeing an opportunity for recovery, the Archchancellor quickly intervened. "It is clear that there are obvious disagreements between our various parties, however it is also clear that we have found an issue that all of us I think can agree to work together on, namely Refugee Rights and Quotas. I am most pleased to hear that Crotobaltislavonia acknowledges the right of its citizens to seek asylum and new lives in neighbouring countries, and I am confident Minister Jedreck will convey his agreement to unrestricted right of exit from his country back to his superiors in Banja Luka."

Vogt spoke quickly, cutting through the growing argument, and distinctly ignoring and in fact, airbrushing the outburst of anti-semitism entirely from her mind and past reality.

"I thank the Kingdom of Eiffeland also, for its extreme generosity in these troubled times. While it is not yet clear how many might seek legitimate refuge from Crotobaltislavonia, I believe 50,000 as a base figure for how many the larger and better resourced Kingdom of Eiffeland might take is an excellent starting figure. I would hesitate of course to suggest so large a figure be applied equally to all our disproportionately capable nations. However I can confirm that Bergenheim has...ah...taken in about two thousand legitimate refugees, at this time."

She neglected to mention that the majority of these "refugees" were people with citizenship either of Bergenheim or one of the other Gallo-Germanian countries, and not technically speaking, pure citizens of CBS or any nations "eastwards".

"Of course we all wish to preserve our borders and stability in such rough times, and I heartily volunteer our own experienced Border Guards to assist anyone who needs help in safeguarding their borders and managing a safe and smooth transition."

Having so quixotically seized control of the conversation,.Vogt reluctantly surrendered the floor to the next speaker, though she kept a beady eye on Jedreck.

Zweigler for her part, crossed her arms, emphasising the sizable bosom so contained, and gave Jedreck a look that suggested he was most definitely not going to be seeing the Mountains of Bergenheim anytime soon....

 

[Rheinbund]

Dr. Schmelzer took the floor to speak again.

"Thank you for your compliments, Mrs. Archchancellor Vogt. Of course we don't expect all countries in the region to take up 50,000 refugees. That number of refugees would be an unacceptably high burdern to countries like Bergenheim. However, please let it be clear that Trivodnia and Eiffelland cannot handle this crisis alone. We call upon other countries to take up refugees as well. Mr. Jedreck, Eiffelland will always do whatever it can when people are forced by the circumstances to flee their homecountry, especially when ethnicity is the key factor because of which they have to flee."

 

[Oneida]

"Excellent," First Deputy Foreign Affairs Minister Demeter Vadas stated "I am hopeful that in the future we can come together at these conferences and decide how many refugees we plan to take upon the next Kadikistani invasion."

The Deputy Minister clearly spoke directly to Schmelzer - but perhaps instantly regretting such an unfiltered statement. Surely, Minister Falkenrath and Chancellor Furst may agree and smirk in private, but standing before the Eiffellander Minister was a different matter in its entirety. "Well," the Minister thought to himself "I've already dug a hole."

"Milesia and Caliida were the first to fall and now Crotobaltislavonia stands as the third. Now thousands of Kadikistani and Xinhaiese troops are deployed right on the borders of many of the countries represented here. We came to this conference to discuss peace. The antagonistic regime at this meeting, Kadikistan aside, is currently using Kadiki troops to systemically hunt down and destroy any opposition to his despotism. This man's government comes to this conference and opens it up by asking how the civilized nations of Europe can solve the problem of his Jewish minority."

The Deputy Minister's blood was flowing and his diplomatic team was pale and silent.

"Dear Minister," he looked to Schmelzer "We will not move the Jewish population from Crotobaltislavonia, we will not sit here and debate whether or not a religious group is a detriment to the stability of our countries. The Empire of Carinthia-Harkány will not sit at this conference and entire these ideas, it will not give them merit. I refuse, absolutely refuse, to sit here and discuss how we handle refugees when the reason that there are refugees is because the powers of Gallo-Germania, once more, remain silent in the face of the slightest opposition."

The Minister sat down and looked for support from his team, all of them sat silently looking at their note pads.

"Well, fuck," Vadas thought to himself.

 

[Kadikistani Union]

Ivica Prepurkovic was stunned, but refused to show it and maintained the stereotypical emotionless Kadikistani stare. Right from the start this meeting was doomed as inept diplomats showed little to no diplomacy and ranted out the most offensive wordings. Attempting to ignore the intervention of Vadas, the First Deputy People's Commissar for External Affairs issued a formal rebuddel. "Our troops are in Crotobaltislavonia at the request of the legitimate government under the Farrago Administration. They will stay there for as long as our allies request them as in accordance with the Mutual Defence and Assistance Treaty signed with the Free Canton of Crotobaltislavonia. Xinhaiese troops are not, as an ill-informed colleague claimed, on the border of any Germanian country in accordance with our bilateral treaty with the Kingdom of Gunnland which states that Xinhaiese forces are not positioned west of the 80th meridian. We did not initiate the situation in Crotobaltislavonia, we can prove Trivodnian involvement with Radek, prior and during the coup. Amstov acted to remove a legitimate government, a repulsive act in itself, and proceeded to lie to the international community, firmly backed by the Trier Concordat. If Crotobaltislavonia would have fallen to Trier, the status quo that we have sworn to protect would've been in shambles. And unlike certain nations, we do not break treaties."

Prepurkovic then turned to his host, noticeably disappointed.

"I must profoundly apologise to our most generous hosts. Surely there was nothing but goodwill coming from Bergenheim when they took this honourable initiative, but we can not work and come to a productive compromise here. That much has been made abundantly clear by many of my colleagues here today. There is no room for the creation of something constructive and we do not have time to sit here and exchange words with propagandists. I thank you for your every effort in facilitating this meeting, but now I must kindly ask that you prepare our plane for departure immediately."

 

[Elben]

Schlabrendorff hadn't said a word yet and already the meeting was breaking down. Jedreck and his Yid talk, platitudes about the fugees, and now the Kadiks were walking out. The count inwardly winced at the mention of breaking of treaties. He had still been traveling after the IOF nonsense when the air bridge fiasco took place.

Elben already had more than its fair share of fugees and he wasn't going to haggle over who would take more. Instead, he got up quietly from his place and moved towards the Kadiki commissar and addressed him quietly.

"Herr Prepurkovic, if I may have a word before you depart. There is renewed hostility between Elben and Kadikistan and I hope that at some point in the future, we can do something to repair relations."

 

[Bergenheim]

Archchancellor Vogt looked like she was about to blow a gasket. Kessler looked up briefly, and for a moment he began to frown. Surely, the Ice Queen was not about to melt her facade of professionalism-

"Sit down will you please, Herr Prepurkovic." She said boldly.

"Your apology is neither accepted nor necessary. It is abundantly clear that many of the representatives in this room-" she gave Vadas a withering death-glare, that seemed to hold within it centuries of repressed and mercurial enmity between a former fiefdom and its imperial master- "have had a very tiring journey, and have chosen to express their fatigue and frustration through the venting of spleens. I am confident that, were they well rested, no mature, adult, experienced diplomats would behave in so wild and intemperate a fashion. Especially on so global a stage."

She put heavy, withering emphasis on this last part.

"I understand that many here feel aggrieved and angered by developments. I myself am angry that the transportation in this city is often late. Why, your own transport, Herr Prepurkovic is undoubtably delayed by this abominable snow and the poor conditions of our roads." Vogt gambled wildly, and Kessler had to admit he had misjudged his colleague once again. No, no mere Ice Queen this. An Ice Skater, surely. Very thin ice, too.

"Minister Vadas, I strongly advise that you retire for the evening, and allow your team to continue for the time being. Obviously your journey from Carinthia-Harkany was most fatiguing. Perhaps Minister Jedreck would also like to take a break?"

Zweigler was looking quite nervous now, her eyes darting from dignitary to dignitary. Was her boss really dressing down some of the most important people in Europa like naughty schoolchildren?

A lesser leader would have quailed before attempting so bold a strategy with the representatives of not one but two neighbouring superpowers.

But Sigrid Vogt was not a lesser leader.

"We have all made a long journey to be here." She reiterated strongly. "We all want something. The people who can give us what we ant are all here. So, while this terrible snowstorm reigns, let us make the most of the time we have, shall we?"

Zweigler noted that it was quite bright and sunny outside, and scarcely even midday by her watch. Vogt's capacity to ignore inconvenient realities was breath-taking...

 

[Tyonic Confederacy]

"May I ask Herr Prepurkivic that you actually show us this information? Because so far I have seen no evidence brought forth to substantiate these claims, it would be best to back up your claims with the facts you have. If the evidence you bring forth is true then we shall agree that the coup was indeed caused, in part or in whole, by Trivodnia and that there should be some form of punishment put forth for the perpetrators. And if the evidence is falsified, well there would be some issues that we would need to address here at this meeting." Her thought process was quite simple, if you have a claim it would be best to back it up with facts so as to have your claim be legitimate. She assumed her colleagues here would agree with this thought process and would like to see these claims backed up in some shape or form.

"Also may I suggest we discuss ending the hostilities and ultimately the removal of foreign troops operating within Crotobaltislavonia, with possibly a joint peacekeeping force to keep the peace until the government is able to keep the peace themselves?" Looking to move forward with the peace talks she decided to propose something for people to at least talk and debate that is positive instead of the outbursts that herself and others have had.

 

[Rheinbund]

“Deputy Minister Vadas, there is no question of us moving the Jewish population out of Crotobaltislavonia. The Jewish Population itself is moving, due to certain developments in their home-country. Furthermore, the aim of this conference is to reach a long-term solution that holds. Invading the country without a good plan for the aftermath will seem to solve the matter on the short term but will mainly create additional problems on the long term,” Schmelzer said.

There was also another reason why the Eiffellandian Government preferred a more observing attitude. Time was on the side of the Trier Concord. Farrago would efficiently break down the economy of Crotobaltislavonia during the years to come, and then the problem would disappear by itself. The only thing that was needed now, was to contain the Rurikgrad Pact and keep it out of Trivodnia and Bergenheim.

“Deputy Commissar Prepurkovic, I am also very interested in the evidence upon which you base your accusation that Trivodnia is behind the coup attempt. Without that evidence, you cannot make such bold accusations. In any case, to us it is essential that the sovereignty of Trivodnia is maintained. It didn’t go unnoticed in Eiffelland that the Xinhaiese troops were retreated to east of the 80th east-meridian, with which we are happy.”

"I also want to make clear that we agree with the suggestion of a peacekeeping force in Crotobaltislavonia. Of course such a peacekeeping force can only be stationed if the Government of Crotobaltislavonia agrees."