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Radilan Media

Radilo

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Nutty's better half
Il Gazzettino
Edizione Italiana | Edision Radèla | English Edition
ilgazzettino.ra | @ilgazzettino​

Budget talks ongoing
The Technicolor Government's proposal is the topic of ongoing discussion in the Budget Committee. While there is general consensus with the budget and for next year's appropriations, there are still particular disagreements. The largest being the amount devoted towards addressing global climate change. This is different from localized climate mitigation efforts, such as shoring up the Lagoon Protective Barrier (BPL) around La Città. The broader plans are mostly outward looking, including the development of renewable fuels in industrializing countries and the recommitment to nuclear power in Gallio-Francia.

Libro d'Oro in @Caria
The Genealogical Association of Nydra and the University of Navarone, in conjuncture with the Office of the Radilan Senate Archivist, is conducing an in-depth genealogical study of Radilans in the Outer Territories, which are former territories of the Republic—in this case they are now part of the Carian Confederacy. This study aims to provide detailed accounts of the various tumults and triumphs of competing Meridian Sea polities. The hope is that this will add a level of richness and depth to the historical record, which is often dominated by a few larger-than-life figures.




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The Most Serene Dankness
@dankserenìsima | dankserenìsima.ra
fresh memes | current podcasts | biting satire

WOW!
so serene
such republic
much fashion
doge doge
so renaissance
many profit
much leadership
boaty mcboatface
such baroque
many gold
much fancy
so st. mark
such sea
many humor
WOW!


Shooting people
"What dumbass mother fucker shoots a head of state. Like that dumbass that shot the Carian First Archon... like what's the point. He ain't got no control over them dumbass legislators." DJ From and Mister Bindi discuss world affairs on the Aw Hell Naw Podcast, available here or wherever you get your podcasts.

Is butt chugging a thing?
Many college students claim that it is, like, waaay faster to get drunk by pouring booze down your butthole... but is this true? See our in-depth reporting, by which we mean our in-anus reporting, here.

Resting bitch face
See all of Prime Minister Lacé's most cunt-esque photos here. And see the most adorable photos of her grandkids here.


tHE dANKESS
WE TAKE NO SIDES! EXCEPT WHEN WE DO!
 
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Radilo

Regional Actor
Joined
Jan 5, 2010
Messages
1,018
Location
Cleveland
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Nuovo Porto
Nick
Nutty's better half
Il Gazzettino
Edizione Italiana | Edision Radèla | English Edition
ilgazzettino.ra | @ilgazzettino
News Alert: Cargo ship grounded in the Searult Canal
A large cargo ship has wedged itself in the major shipping route going through @Csegia. The situation is still developing, but initial reports suggest that strong winds may have been a factor. The vessel, named the Everforward, is harbored and flagged in Thoricus @Caria. It is operated by the Mainline Meridian Shipping Company, which is owned by the wealthy senatorial Magadesi family, though it is incorporated in Caria. The ship is 369 meters long; it is Triton Class vessel, built in Nuovo Porto by the San Polo Shipbuilders.

The vessel is crewed by an international team, with a Radilan skipper. Neither the company nor the Magadesi family could be reached for comment.
 

Radilo

Regional Actor
Joined
Jan 5, 2010
Messages
1,018
Location
Cleveland
Capital
Nuovo Porto
Nick
Nutty's better half
The Most Serene Dankness
@dankserenìsima | dankserenìsima.ra
fresh memes | current podcasts | biting satire

Big ol' boat got stuck
"So this big ass shipping container got stuck in the Searult canal... Holy Fuck that is the funniest shit ever." "Big ol' boat got stuck." "This is some of the dumbest ass shit ever." "Big ol' boat got stuck!" DJ From and Mister Bindi discuss world affairs on the Aw Hell Naw Podcast, available here or wherever you get your podcasts.

They call it Florida shit
The feast of Pascha, right around Easter, is a sacred time to Catholics across the globe. It must apply especially hard to @Justosia . As they are very much the hyper-narrowly divided country. Either way, their shenanigans and divisions are detailed here (or wherever you get your podcasts) on the Good Ol' Times Podcast, featuring Micky and Jimmy the square.

No...we totally ain't Pelasgian.
Radila is totally a product of the Tiburan Empire and had totally no Eastern influence.

Ya know....
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No Pelasgian influence...

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...no influence from @Caria whatsoever...

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Radilo

Regional Actor
Joined
Jan 5, 2010
Messages
1,018
Location
Cleveland
Capital
Nuovo Porto
Nick
Nutty's better half
Il Gazzettino
Edizione Italiana | Edision Radèla | English Edition
ilgazzettino.ra | @ilgazzettino
Major Demographic Changes Accompany Refugees
According to the preliminary census, Radilo's population has grown for the first time since the end of the baby-boom following the Great War in the mid 20th Century. Because of an influx of refugees, mostly from the Former Pannonia, Radilo's population has increased by more than a million, to 9.7 million people. This means that more than 1 in 10 Radilans are Zaran refugees. In several smaller cities and towns, Zarans make up a plurality of the population.

Radilo had seen steady population loss since the end of the post-war population boom, and even with this new influx, of people the population is still lower today than it was in 1974, when the population peaked at 10.2 million. Because Radilo has the lowest fertility rate in the world, at 1.24 births per woman, and one of the longest life expectancies, at 85 years, the population is disproportionately older and retired. This has led to the government's current policies which includes an open-door immigration policy and generous benefits to refugees, who are disproportionately younger and working age.

As Zarans speak the standard Italianate Language (which, in fact, is often simply called Zaran, which is also the official language of Radilo), have a very similar culture, are overwhelmingly Tiburan Catholic, and are ethnically similar to Peninsular Italianates, their integration has been fairly straightforward, if not painless. Refugees are generally settled in smaller cities and towns and in rural areas outside of Nouvo Porto, as these areas have seen massive depopulation over the last 40-odd years. The famously romantic city of Badua has seen a bit of a boom recently, as the injection of younger (and generally very eager) refugees has helped revitalize the city.

With the ongoing conflicts in Himyar, it is likely that Radilo will see even more refugees in the coming years. Given that these Himyari refugees will not speak Italian and are, mostly, not Catholic, some, including Opposition Leader Giuseppe Piero, have suggested that more intense integration efforts may be necessary.

"I think that we need to be much more thorough with these refugees from Himyar, especially those from conservative Muhammadite traditions. They will need extra help integrating and will need to be checked on, I think, more than Zarans," said the White Party Leader

Imam Giuseppe Mbeki, leader of the Interfaith Refugee Alliance, who is heading to Himyar later this week to help start the resettlement process, disagrees: "Given how quickly we have integrated other non-Italianate, non-Catholic immigrant populations in the past, including my own family, we should have no problem integrating these hardworking people into our society."
 
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Radilo

Regional Actor
Joined
Jan 5, 2010
Messages
1,018
Location
Cleveland
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Nuovo Porto
Nick
Nutty's better half

Il Gazzettino



Edizione Italiana | Edision Radèla | Engellish Edition
ilgazzettino.ra | @ilgazzettino


Interfaith Refugee Aliance in Azraq and Harj
The Interfaith Refugee Alliance, an agency that works with both the Catholic Refugee Agency and the International Association of the Red Crescent, has had to scale back its activities in Harj due to the recent coup d'etat. Activities are expected to resume once the situation settles.

In @Azraq, the IRA is working with sailors from @Tianlong to assist with their aid mission. Fewer refugees are expected from that region, at least, as of now, as it is generally considered more stable.

New alliance proposed
As an Il Gazzettino exclusive, we can confirm that at the Forum on Security and Democracy in Tokjin, Tianlong. A treaty has been introduced that will establish a military alliance, the Central European Treaty Organization or CETO. This treaty would serve as a defensive alliance among democratic nation states. Such an alliance has traditionally polled very well in Radilo, despite a longtime official commitment to neutrality. Indications from the current government suggest that ratifying such a treaty would enjoy overwhelming, in not unanimous support.
 
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Radilo

Regional Actor
Joined
Jan 5, 2010
Messages
1,018
Location
Cleveland
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Nuovo Porto
Nick
Nutty's better half

Il Gazzettino
Edizione Italiana | Edision Radèla | Engellish Edition
ilgazzettino.ra | @ilgazzettino

End of basic income max
The Lower House of the Senate today voted to end the maximum income limit on Universal Basic Income. This means that regardless of income level every Radialn citizen, national, and resident is eligible for a ~400 Lira a month minimum payment. Opponents of the bill say it is money wasted on wealthy people who don't need it. Blue Party senators have argued that many people need many types of help, beyond absolute subsistence--and that truly universal programs are typically better protected than poverty-only ones. So it is, they argue, vital that everyone is eligible.

"it is better that one rich man get an unearned benefit, than a thousand hungry people go wanting, " said the 92 year old activist Lulu DeVain, wife of the deceased former Prime Minister Michael DeVain.


New atomic carriers ordered
A massive new military project has been announced: two new fully nuclear aircraft carriers, yet unnamed. Two ship builders from @Pelasgia, including Nea Lykaonia Shipyards, have signed contracts ro provide essential parts. Apparently, technology from @Tianlong will also be imported, particularly regarding advanced atomic-powered batteries. These military actions had been secret until recently.
 
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Radilo

Regional Actor
Joined
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Location
Cleveland
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Nutty's better half
The Most Serene Dankness
@dankserenìsima | dankserenìsima.ra
fresh memes | current podcasts | biting satire

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WOW! so serene such republic much fashion doge doge so renaissance many profit much leadership boaty mcboatface such baroque many gold much fancy so st. mark such sea many humor WOW!


The Aw Hell Naw Podcast Transcript

Baritone Announcer: welcome back to the Aw Hell Naw Podcast with hosts DJ From and Mister Bindi. Coming to you from the dankest section of the world wide web.

DJ From: so you had one more thing you wanted to say about our colleague Gio Rogo?

Mister Bindi: yea, I'm not firing him. Just in case that wasn't clear. I think he's a dumbass, but he's our most popular podcast, especially his Engellex language edition. And I'm not going to fire a guy for something stupid he said before he worked here. That would not be right, or fair.

DJ From: not to mention it's kinda weird we get our more lefty extra vocal viewers giving him the most shit.

Mister Bindi: given he's a Chancellor Xi fanboy... yea.

DJ From: she likes him, actually...

Mister Bindi: and she also thinks he's an idiot.

DJ From: is that how you treat your best employee?

Mister Bindi: he freely admits he's a meat head. In fact he's proud of it.

DJ From: now that's out of the way, need I remind people that you, in addition to being editor-in-chief of The Most Serene Dankness, are the head AP correspondent in Radilo. You are a man of many hats.

Mister Bindi: only one of which is a jester's hat. That's also why you have to do most of the heavy lifting around here.

DJ From: haha, but recently, you, as the prodigal son you are, accompanied the Doge to that shitty ass Tsar wedding. Which he attended much to the chagrin of many of our new Zaran friends. Including our producer Gonzaga Jimmy, who is now shaking his head at me... and lighting up a fat roll... I see he is integrating well into the culture... and he's now flicking me off. *Micky Mouse voice* I feel that he's going to fuck with the sound editing for this episode.

Mister Bindi" *Goofy voice* yea probably. *normal voice resumes* Well we have something that'll make his day a lot better. Because there might be an AP reporter who might have been tipped off by a certain meme dog about what was about to go down...

DJ From: oh shit!

Mister Bindi: yeaaa... somebody might have recorded what the Doge said to that cunt of a Csengian Queen, Erzsébet.

Somewhat fuzzy recording: "Gazie, vostra Maestà. If the two of you are willing to take advice, I may offer some... enjoy being heads of state, stay away from governments at all costs. I've learned of the pleasures of political ambivalence. Let the people decide. See how much more I enjoy my station than your father... but for you, your highness, know this... you will need to spend the rest of your life looking over your shoulder. Because a million of my fellow Citizens would happily drag a blade across your throat. Every maid, butler, carriage driver, courtier, body guard... you may, as the last thing you see, find them standing over you, grinning as they take your life... sleep well, your highness."

DJ From: holy fuck...

Mister Bindi: yea... it's pretty fucking intense.

DJ From: Gonzaga Jimmy is fucking wide eyed with his joint hanging out of his mouth.

Mister Bindi: yea... I don't think that the Radilan Citizens of Zaran extraction have to worry about the Doge supporting them--even when it isn't a pleasant or politically correct situation.

DJ From: damn... and haven't you gotten another hot tip?

Mister Bindi: shhh... I may be on assignment next week. Lots of Jesus talk is expected. I'll be gone when this episode airs.

DJ From: holy fuck this is a lot to talk about. Are we even going to get into that crazy shit coming out of Pelasgia?

Mister Bindi: we gotta break down the situation in the former Pannonia... we'll have to deal with Greek craziness next week. And we will have an epic story on that. But first a word from this week's sponsor WeDelivr, Gallia-Germania's top booze delivery app...

tHE dANKESS
WE TAKE NO SIDES! EXCEPT WHEN WE DO!


@The Ottawas
@Tarusa
 
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Radilo

Regional Actor
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La Piccola Cazzuta
Radila's Proudest Dyke & Fag Rag

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Closeted and pathetic
If anyone wants some loosely sourced international drama, I'm your gal. So, unless you've been living under a rock, you'll be fully aware of @Pelasgia totally going ape shit over the Holy Father's recent pronouncement regarding the treatment of queer families within the church. While that has been welcome news for queer Catholics in most of Europe (my wife broke down in tears when we watched Il Papa's speech, but you've already read enough about that), in the Greek world people flipped a fucking lid. Il Papa was prevented from praying in the Church of the Holy Sepulchre--fine be petty, but what happened next was shameful. Catholic families who wouldn't suck the Emperor's little limp cock have been harassed and in some cases arrested, and, yet again, queer people are facing even more intimidation and imprisonment for simply existing. It is no wonder that Radilo has seen an uptick in educated, liberal Pelasgians moving here in recent years. In fact in San Polo, Valletta, which is only a short ferry ride away from Pelasgia, there is a vibrant Hellenic Queer community.

And it is because of that community that we have this titillating bit of gossip: As you know the wonderfully dorky, yet sadly camera shy Despotess of Pelasgia, Anna Vatzaina Dandolo, is married to the equally nerdy Emilio Dandolo II. Apparently Mrs. Despotess Dandolo let it slide to her father-in-law's domestic staff that her baby brother, Despot Basil, a commander in the Pelasgian Navy, is as gay as a 3 lira note. Apparently, he and his wife are both happily married as sexless a dyke/fag couple. Of course, I'm sure he is getting plenty of action on the side, fucking every seaman in rim-job distance during his many months out at sea. And I'm sure she enjoys those same long stretches as she lounges about her palace in the company of a working class maid who is now her "best friend," who she shares a bed with for "warmth."

It makes sense when you think about it. No country ran by straight people would be so threatened by a visit from some old Holy man who preaches love and tolerance, unless it's led by a group of repressed fags who need to live up to the Greek ideal of masculinity... while forgetting that the most masculine of all Pelasgians, from Alexander the Conqueror to Constantine the IX, were as gay as the come.

Closeted and pathetic. That people must suffer for this insecurity is a tragedy and an insult to God. Jesus wept... and Homer laughed... but only so he didn't cry.
 
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Pelasgia

Elder Statesman
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Sep 30, 2014
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Athens, Greece
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Demos
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Pelasgian Empire
Ministry of the Interior
State Oversight Committee for Telecommunications and Broadcasting


*** WARNING: PROHIBITED CONTENT! ***

This content has been blocked in Pelasgia pursuant to a decision of the State Oversight Committee for Telecommunications and Broadcasting (E.K.E.TIL.RA.) for violating the law. Unauthorised viewing of this content within Pelasgia, including by use of a VPN or other technological medium to circumvent IP blocks, constitutes a punishable offence within the meaning of Art. 46 of Law 149/2006 "Respecting information, information technology and informational safety" (16 Theod. VIII No. 149).

Relevant Decisions of the Committee:
Complainant: The Prosecutor General
Respondent: La Piccola Cazzuta
Case No.: 247/2022

The case at bar was referred to the Committee by the Prosecutor General, both on his own initiative and on account of multiple complaints regarding the content posted by the Radillan publication "La Piccola Cazzuta" (hereinafter, "the Respondent") on its website on 14/08/2022 under the heading "Closeted and pathetic", which was alleged to violate several provisions of Committee's enabling act (Law 149/2006). Specifically, the Prosecutor General alleged that the Respondent violated Article 43 of Law 149/2006, by insulting the Pelasgian Nation (paragraph 13), grossly offending public norms and morality (paragraphs 15 and 16), demeaning and blaspheming against religious sentiment and the State Church (paragraph 8), and insulting a member of the Imperial Family and, with the him, the dignity of the Sublime Throne (paragraphs 3 and 5). [...]

Following a review of the content in question, the Committee has reached the conclusion that the complaint is founded, and that the Respondent has violated all articles cited by the Complainant. [...] The Committee also finds that the Respondent did so with a view to reaching an audience as wide as possible, and without having made necessary verifications to back up its statements, which resulted in false statements of a defamatory character. These all constitute aggravating circumstances under Article 50 of Law 149/2006.
In light of its findings, the Committee:
1. Imposes a publication ban on all the Respondent's publications, in both online and print from, across the entirety of the Pelasgian Empire and on any website or other broadcasting service based or operating in Pelasgia for an indefinite duration.
2. Prohibits any current employees of the Respondent, or any persons implicated in its publication process, from conducting any activity in Pelasgia that falls within the Committee's regulatory oversight.
3. Imposes a fine of six million (6.000.000) obols, plus interest, on the Respondent, to be paid immediately. If the Respondent should fail to make payment of the fine, any assets it or any of its owners, stakeholders, employees, officers, or directors, present or future, owns or comes to own in Pelasgia shall be subject to liquidation to cover the sum of the fine.
4. Requires the Respondent to withdraw the offending publication and make a full public apology to all harmed parties.

Decided in Propontis, on August 15, 2022.
 
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