The Republican Pages

[Echten]

Stadtholder Pauwel von Rijdners Announces New Timeline for Satellite


Stadtholder released his new ambitious plans for launching Satellite Voederhall by mid Summer! The Senate, while worried at first was reassured later this evening during private talks with the Stadtholder. Voting commenced one hour after the meeting and was a unanimous victory for science! Over 25 Million more Guilders have been pledged to the product, and engineers are hopeful that with the extra work and funding they should have Voederhall up in the skies by late July.

This is merely the latest in a four month long drive to get more funding into the hands of our nations brightest. I can only imagine how the researchers must! How exciting to know that they are all getting the job done.

Other news

>Art Museum, De Zintuigen, continues the hunt for its lost masterpieces. Police suspect that the paintings were lost, and are not conducting an investigation at this time.

>Tourist walks free after an alleged assault against an Echten citizen. Protests began quickly in front of the police station, and were allowed to remain there until they gave up and went home. Talk about dedication!

>Director of The Republican Papers, Adam De Vries declares that he is definitely not in the pocket of the Rijdners clan and only attends there parties to not appear rude.

 

[Echten]

Home Gas Leak Causes Tragic Explosion in Family Home

Early this morning, four family members died in a tragic explosion, that officials say has most likely been caused by a stove gas leak.

"What it looks like to me is that the Uncle here, woke up and decided to start tea. The stove top didn't light right or something and the apartment filled with gas. Then he kind of lies back down, goes to bed for a minute more. Wakes up and decides he's going to have a smoke and destroyed his families lives." said one investigator.

Tragic indeed. Some people are actually trying to cry conspiracy on the event however, claiming that the domestic DIB had no business getting involved in a gas explosion. Regardless of the circumstances, Stadtholder reminds us that a tragedy is a tragedy regardless of the circumstances. We should be worried about the safety of our ovens rather then whether the government cares enough about its citizens to Federally investigate horrific appliance failures.

Other News

>Senate votes and decides to allow for a new Law and Order budget, in response to the Zintuigen museum robberies. Stadtholder himself will be deciding the new budget. The budget will not be public until such time as Stadtholder deems necessary or in times of economic crisis.

>It is almost time for a new contract to be written up, that will determine which country Echten outsources its small prison population too. The Advisory for Foreign Policy will begin work immediately on a new contract with a new nation to send its undesirables.

 

[Echten]

Stadtholder Answers Rumors that DIB was Present at Explosion


Today our glorious Stadtholder addressed truly disturbing accusations. A tape was released that seems to be DIB officials organizing the explosion that killed a Christian family last week. Here is an excerpt of his speech;

"These accusations are completely detestable. Whoever is spreading such slander will be found, and will be jailed for spreading such malicious misinformation. Let me be clear to my Christian brothers and Sisters. You have nothing to fear from your government. I know some years ago I was adamant about not practicing a religion openly, but that does not mean I do not believe in the Almighty or pray to him every night. I hope that you all see the devil in these lies and go to sleep tonight, knowing you are kept safe every day be me and the DIB."

The malicious and totally false tape was very long and had many troubling details, that seemed only a true spy could know. But surely our almighty Stadtholder would never lie to us. Here is a small quote from the tape, just to show our readers the dangerously false accusations in full.

"That's a shame what happened to him."

"Always was an idiot, we told him that they were new explosives. Not to dick around. Did he listen?"

"No he was never huge on the listening. Well I suppose the job got done all the same."

"Yep, won't be hearing from that leader of the Christian dissidence anymore."

"Yes, let us hope the public buys the gas explosion story. Wasn't suppose to have an extra body in there though! Hahaha-"

As you can see, these were no play rumors that our Stadtholder dealt with today. Why should we be bothered to think for ourselves when someone as trustworthy as the Stadtholder looks down upon us? Surely if there was anything to worry about he would be shining a light on it, not covering his own ass.

 

[Echten]

New Management for Republican Pages!


Hello readers! Recently these fabulous Pages have been bought out! With new management comes more interesting news! Gone are the days of pointless bully journalism from these fine Pages! The previous owners heard your massive complaints and because of them sold to us in a matter of days! The clearly biased article trash talking our fabulous Stadtholder should be forgotten. As you will not be reading this sort of thing from us again.

In Other News

>Former Republican Pages Editor Dies in Car Accident

>Stadtholder Pauwel von Rijdners Approval Rate Remains at 70%!

 

[Echten]

Stadtholder Disbands Domestic Defense Intelligence

The DIB (Defense Intelligence Bureau) Domestic has been completely disbanded today. Stadtholder Pauwel dedicates it to a new era of domestic peace within Echten. Although the Statdholder called for a medal award ceremony for the current acting Director, but the man was nowhere to be found. I certainly cannot imagine why any man would not want to receive accommodation for their service!

If you should see Baki Leijen, pictured below, you are urged to get in contact with authorities as soon as possible. Our great Stadtholder is so eager to give this man his medal, that he will pay you up too 10,000 Rijksdaalders is you can provide relaiable information about his whereabouts. Again that is Baki Leijen, director of what once was the Domestic Defense Intelligence.