The DMZ (Heart of the Thaumantic Order)
"And so, Laird Almskeeper, we predict a civil war . . " the head of Conor MacBain's foreign advisory staff from Cantignia, one Damperod Tharawal, began.
"In Ebria!" one advisor from Engwahl interrupted before a Nieve corrected with "Tarusa!".
Tharawal shook his head no, "why yes they are tying up in civil wars, so there is nothing predicted, and they were cheeky they might shout out Thaumantica."
MacBain scowled and made a sign of his throating being cut towards his Nievish advisor and called the Engwahlian one a "little shit bird who can only be trusted to lay that."
"Here between the Thaumanticans . . " Tharawal suggested, "it is the shadow of Tarusa which keeps Engwahl and Nieveland together now that none can remember why."
The Nievish and Engwahlian advisors poked and prodded at each other across the table and scoffed as Conor MacBain stood and shouted "NO!".
This was of course unconvincing to the Cantignians or Engwahlians, but sufficient for Nieves of this Thaumantic Order. MacBain stomped out of the room and slammed the door behind himself.
"Our Order has expanded with the Gutnish Christian Commune, and I think we could rally ourselves . ." Tharawal tried with new Cantignian Almskeeper Steve Ricks nodding and offering an open hand to the others at the table.
The Engwahlians curdled with laughter, "'NO!'" one aped while Balthazar Austin Drake, their new Almskeeper, stood laboriously and peered across the table with narrowed lids. "We might starve you tomorrow for your attack today. No, no, you Nievishmen would lose in a month!"
"So is it tomorrow or in a month when we drop dead from not sucking on Engwahl's utter?" A Nieve fired back.
"How do you think Conor will handle the Gutarike situation?" Drake relented, done with the tit for tat.
Tharawal Damperod raised his eyebrows and knocked some knuckles on the table to reset the Nieves when Conor himself, that premier Nieve, returned and ordered the other Nievishmen out. "Fuck'em and theirs . ." an outgoing Nieve said for the rest of them, a sentiment MacBain both held and sought to remedy in his country which caught the weight of Engwahl's Imperial collapse and responsibilities.
"Balthazar, yes, our angry ugly Nievish peasants will revolt and fucking sack you when there is no foreign one else to blame, but why, why doesn't Engwahl open up its alms to the Order in this time of expansion?" MacBain asked, as if his character of rage had cooled supernaturally outside.
"Good deals are abound here, and what if we pivoted to Vesper for a . ." Steve Ricks suggested before being groaned down by his partners.
Drake acted the oblivious fool and shrugged, "We do not know what these Nieves, weekend warriors, and reavers want but riches . . and yet their every action drives out investment and trade, and so how will you unfuck this Conor? Would you marry a Pressburg Pirate"
"On Gutland we like the current situation," Conor replied, "Cantignian Troopers present the best of us, and we will re-deploy again this winter if the Engwahlians in the room offer up their salt, coal, and go along with what our Order was doing before we marked our names here."
"Engwahl doesn't like this deployment any more than Nieveland, okay?" Balthazar responded "But are Nieves invested there? We traded first blood and have certain actions and events to . ."
"Fuckin' war crimes, your Engwahlian Troopers blew through villages that we hold because no one is left!" MacBain said.
"AND IF . . and if, or if, thusly because . . " Steve Ricks interjected, "none should know how when we go to war villages are rend and made no more. Mister MacBain: I think that Engwahl will be fairer with its foods, in time, because if not we will . . okay? . . fucking wreck them, globally, because alright no one is talking here about the Engwahlian Serault and all of Engwahl's misadventures . . . Listen guys, this is communalism, we will eat today and starve tomorrow together and I, my guys, do not think either of you are ready to leave.
"Civil war does sound nice right about now, Damperod," Conor jested, but Tharawal rejoined and reminded first the numbers in the room - the so-called allies and the Order's enemies and finished saying "We might retire here with Order intact and revisit this circus tomorrow?"
"Fuck-him, fine, tomorrow." Balthazar answered, as if it was the reason he was elected, and cast an ugly curse across Nieveland before leaving and shouting "ABSOLUTELY NOT!" for his team with a slam of the door.
"And so, Laird Almskeeper, we predict a civil war . . " the head of Conor MacBain's foreign advisory staff from Cantignia, one Damperod Tharawal, began.
"In Ebria!" one advisor from Engwahl interrupted before a Nieve corrected with "Tarusa!".
Tharawal shook his head no, "why yes they are tying up in civil wars, so there is nothing predicted, and they were cheeky they might shout out Thaumantica."
MacBain scowled and made a sign of his throating being cut towards his Nievish advisor and called the Engwahlian one a "little shit bird who can only be trusted to lay that."
"Here between the Thaumanticans . . " Tharawal suggested, "it is the shadow of Tarusa which keeps Engwahl and Nieveland together now that none can remember why."
The Nievish and Engwahlian advisors poked and prodded at each other across the table and scoffed as Conor MacBain stood and shouted "NO!".
This was of course unconvincing to the Cantignians or Engwahlians, but sufficient for Nieves of this Thaumantic Order. MacBain stomped out of the room and slammed the door behind himself.
"Our Order has expanded with the Gutnish Christian Commune, and I think we could rally ourselves . ." Tharawal tried with new Cantignian Almskeeper Steve Ricks nodding and offering an open hand to the others at the table.
The Engwahlians curdled with laughter, "'NO!'" one aped while Balthazar Austin Drake, their new Almskeeper, stood laboriously and peered across the table with narrowed lids. "We might starve you tomorrow for your attack today. No, no, you Nievishmen would lose in a month!"
"So is it tomorrow or in a month when we drop dead from not sucking on Engwahl's utter?" A Nieve fired back.
"How do you think Conor will handle the Gutarike situation?" Drake relented, done with the tit for tat.
Tharawal Damperod raised his eyebrows and knocked some knuckles on the table to reset the Nieves when Conor himself, that premier Nieve, returned and ordered the other Nievishmen out. "Fuck'em and theirs . ." an outgoing Nieve said for the rest of them, a sentiment MacBain both held and sought to remedy in his country which caught the weight of Engwahl's Imperial collapse and responsibilities.
"Balthazar, yes, our angry ugly Nievish peasants will revolt and fucking sack you when there is no foreign one else to blame, but why, why doesn't Engwahl open up its alms to the Order in this time of expansion?" MacBain asked, as if his character of rage had cooled supernaturally outside.
"Good deals are abound here, and what if we pivoted to Vesper for a . ." Steve Ricks suggested before being groaned down by his partners.
Drake acted the oblivious fool and shrugged, "We do not know what these Nieves, weekend warriors, and reavers want but riches . . and yet their every action drives out investment and trade, and so how will you unfuck this Conor? Would you marry a Pressburg Pirate"
"On Gutland we like the current situation," Conor replied, "Cantignian Troopers present the best of us, and we will re-deploy again this winter if the Engwahlians in the room offer up their salt, coal, and go along with what our Order was doing before we marked our names here."
"Engwahl doesn't like this deployment any more than Nieveland, okay?" Balthazar responded "But are Nieves invested there? We traded first blood and have certain actions and events to . ."
"Fuckin' war crimes, your Engwahlian Troopers blew through villages that we hold because no one is left!" MacBain said.
"AND IF . . and if, or if, thusly because . . " Steve Ricks interjected, "none should know how when we go to war villages are rend and made no more. Mister MacBain: I think that Engwahl will be fairer with its foods, in time, because if not we will . . okay? . . fucking wreck them, globally, because alright no one is talking here about the Engwahlian Serault and all of Engwahl's misadventures . . . Listen guys, this is communalism, we will eat today and starve tomorrow together and I, my guys, do not think either of you are ready to leave.
"Civil war does sound nice right about now, Damperod," Conor jested, but Tharawal rejoined and reminded first the numbers in the room - the so-called allies and the Order's enemies and finished saying "We might retire here with Order intact and revisit this circus tomorrow?"
"Fuck-him, fine, tomorrow." Balthazar answered, as if it was the reason he was elected, and cast an ugly curse across Nieveland before leaving and shouting "ABSOLUTELY NOT!" for his team with a slam of the door.
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