News Cetnik Empire

[Јебач]

GREAT NAZI PURGE, CETNIK ARMY PROMISES TO NAZIS TO NEVER RISE.​

Few days after dictator announced nazis as a terrorists and that he will litterally shot every single one of them, people have started changing their minds after few patriarch talks, and after dictator "haunted" the nazis. Basically kid would go out play games with friends and if they would say word nazi or Ustasa, kids parents would be in no time inspected... However this hunt on nazis is showing great results, as popularity of nazis dropped for more than 5%. Which a lot. Dictator called an end to a Ustasas, which were attacking jewish homes, basically jews were not able to even sleep properly and to not think about getting attacked. Situation now is much much better, flew of refuges has stopped and everything as getting back together. Dictator sad "When jews in this country sleep tight, that means all Ustasas are dead." Which happened, however its not confirmed that all Ustasas are dead, so there are still loads of police roaming around jewish regions. We had interview with one jewish mother.

Journalist: So how does it feel for things to be normal right now?
Jew: Well, im really happy that me and my family can sleep tight without caring if someone will drop a bomb on us.
Journalist: How did you survived the "jewish purge".
Jew:Well, we were ones hou just wanted to leave this country. But we needed to wait, we live near location were muslims attacked jewish houses. It was really scary, my and my familiy got into the basement, we tough that government is coming to massacre us. When shooting stopped my husband gone outside with his gun, to check out what happened, after he checked he told us "everything will be ok, it was just muslim terrorists". Next few days we could not even sleep properly, we were packed for going to Trivodnia, a neighboring country. We were even more scared after dictators hate speech on jews. After that we couldnt sleep. However luckily, thanks god, the dictator has changed his mind, but than... The so called "nazis or "Ustasas", however you call them, were riding the towns. We were every night hearing shots. First day of "Nazi purge" was worst, airplanes would be flying just above our heads, and tanks, army and police would be patrolling the town 24/7, which somehow made us feel safer. But, we just heard, bombs, guns, screams... It was like living at the borders of hell, so close that i could hear the hell itself. Next day tank with few army man passed our streets, after that, army man came into our house telling us to hide in basement to avoid getting killed. We were scared sh*tless. We heard bombs and tank fire, just above us. It was loud and scary. We prayed to god non-stop when that was happening. Few hours later policeman told us that its safe and that we can leave the basement. We than looked threw the window, we saw dead bodies all over the streets. A bit further we saw houses on fire. Luckily it was far enough, so we were safe. After that, everything stopped. It was all normal, even tough streets are still filled with cops and military, i didnt heard shots whole day. I can let kids go out and play, without being scared if they will get back alive... Terrifying.
Journalist: Im happy that you and your family are safe again, we hope same for all jews in Cetnija. Thank you for coming on the show.
Jew: Thank you.

So after we confirmed that our borders are secured by our all mighty police, dictator made a speech, he promised to continue his hunting even beyond our borders! He announced a bigger and better army, that will be ready to destroy any nazi on this planet.

Dictator: We are aware of nazis leaving our country and entering other countries. Now we must make sure that they never return to our country. After that we will make sure that world is clear from this idiots. Now im making my statement. After me make our army even greater, if we see one uprising, or one country going nazi, we will be in no time sending our bombers to bomb the living s*it out of that country. Than we will send our land army to kill them all. If any government seeks support against the nazis, we will give them all support needed support to fight of these evils. For all of this we will need 60k more man in our army! We also need more equipment for our army. We will from now on non-stop improving our army, until we get what we want. And thats, dead nazis.

 

[Rheinbund]

Aussenministerium
Trier, Eiffelland

It is good to see that the attacks against Jews have stopped in the Cetnik Empire. We commend the Dicator for his commitment to protect the Jews. Regarding Nazis and Ustashas appearing in Eiffelland, we ensure that we can handle that problem perfectly ourselves. It is not needed for the armed forces of the Cetnik Empire to hunt Nazis and Ustashas in Eiffelland.

Rudolph Kögler, Minister for Foreign Affairs and Vice-Chancellor

 

[Јебач]

Orthodox Christmas​

Since Chetnik Orthodox church uses Julian calendar, the Christmas in Chetnik Empire is at 7th January. Since the most of Chetnik families lent 40 days before christmas and in same time, at time of this great lent the dictatorship bans production of meat and dairy products for 40 days. Today, Christmas in Chetnik empire, farmers are producing meat and dairy products again, people peacefully celebrating all over the country in holy happiness. This morning churches were full of people, most of people were out of their homes at church for holy communion. After that was finished, in center of Ravna Gora, at its biggest monastery of Saint Sava, patriarch made speech, wishing peace, prosperity and happiness to all orthodox christians. "This is biggest and holiest celebration of all in Chetnik Empire! Let us celebrate the one Holy god! God be with Chetnik Empire!" Patriarch sad. From most recent calculations, 91% of Chetnik population is Orthodox, 7% is Muslim, 1% Jewish and 1% are smaller minorities.

 

[Јебач]

Dictator of Chetnik Empire warns about Black Market Activity​

Our nation's intellegence has discovered a massively increased black market activity - Dictator sad for Television. "We are warning world about this, this is especially dangerous due to nazis, which unfortunately use every chance to profit, cause they'r terrorist organization has no general source of income. They will use black market as theyr income, and we all know how scary that is. Every day, nazis are gaining more money, more military power, which is ultimately a grave danger to the whole world. I am urging all nations, especially those in conflict, civil war, and nations in crisis. You must stop this black market madness, cause if you dont stop it, bad will happen. We are also offering help to fight the nazis who run this black market trend."

As dictator sad on television, world must step up its game, to fight against the black market nazis, who benefit, for sure, more than any nation, faction or group in any war. Chetnik intellegence has pointed finger especially at nations in crisis and conflict, as they are hearth of black market and nazi activities. As dictator sad Chetnik Empire is offering its help to any nation in order to fight black market activity made by nazis.

 

[Rheinbund]

Aussenministerium
Trier, Eiffelland

We thank the Dictator of the Chetnik Empire for this warning. We ourselves are also very keen on fighting the black market, not only because of unwanted elements earning their money there, but also because the black market makes items available to such elements that we don't want to be in the hands of such elements. Think of fighter planes, for instance.

Rudolph Kögler, Minister for Foreign Affairs and vice-chancellor

 

[Јебач]

Military updates of Chetnik Empire
​

Chetnik military has announced the upgraded version of

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main battle tank called

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. Military experts say that Jebac can be upgraded to the planned Jebac 2 tank. "This glorious tank, will enter our glorious army next month. After all final tests are finished, we will be also able to upgrade all Jebac tanks to Jebac 2." sad Dictator of Chetnik Empire. "We are also working on a

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, which is currently in basic test phase, but if everything goes as planned, this thing will enter our army probably around 2nd or 3rd quarter of 1957. Thats was not the last thing, our recruits will enter army in 3 days, increasing our military personnel from 750k man to 950k man. However we will for now concentrate more on increasing quality of our current troops.

-Other news

Dictator of Chetnik Empire Milan Ninkovic invites Adolf Schemid to Ravna Gora, which Adolf accepted, its planned that he will come at 27th March.

 

[Јебач]

LGBTQ community existence questioned​

Talks about growing LGBTQ couples started back in 1954, however dictator widely ignored it, while in same time "living the alone". However yestarday dictator was visited by LGBTQ community leader of Chetnik Empire. However it was a massive scandal. Scene was recorded by security camera, and than dictator himself published the video.
First 10 minutes of video it can be seen as really friendly talk, however after 10 minutes, LGBTQ community gay asked about gay parades to be allowed, in a blink of an eye mood of dictator changed, from calm, to someone who wants to kill somebody.
And than dictator sad "Listen here you sodomist mutherfucker, this is last time you question me this, you and you fucking parades and all the gay sick bullshit that im listening here for whole 10 minutes is too much.
*grabs the LGBTQ leader buy his throat with his strong arm*
All of you will be gone, like when god stormed Sodome, i will make sure that every single gay couple is disrespected, i mean it, DIS-RES-PEC-TED. You got it? You better memorize it, cause this my last and first warning to all the chicken nuggets out there. You houses will be burned, and your lives will be threatened.
You have 3 secounds to fuck off from this building or i will rip off your throat.
*Dictator leaves the LGBTQ guy who ran out of his room immediately, than dictator looks at the camera, and says*
My beloved citizens of Chetnik Empire, all i sad was true, however, what i sad was only for those gays, who think its natural, and accept it. I hate those gays, that chicken nuggets as i sad will be disrespected and their lives threatened. But for those of you who have that gay drive and realise that its bad, you will be ok, i would also suggest you going to the church and asking for help from priest. So in general gay couples will be illegal, and those people will be either exiled for our country, jailed, or killed, depends on my mood. Thank you for your time."
*Tape ends*
There is around 1322 registered gay couples in Chetnik Empire. Most of those couples got their houses raided by police, couples either got jailed, exiled and around 21 gay couples publicly executed. After all of this, dicatator has made a poll, where people were asked what they think about this decision
89% of Chetniks approved it 4% disapproved 7% were neutral.

 

[Rheinbund]

Aussenministerium
Trier, Eiffelland

We regret to see that the dictator of the Chetnik Empire prefers to talk with his fists instead of his mouth. We also condemn the recent actions against gay couples in the Chetnik Empire. Gays fleeing the Chetnik Empire will be granted asylum in Eiffelland.

Rudolph Kögler, Minister for Foreign Affairs and Vice-Chancellor

 

[Јебач]

Population boom continues in Chetnik Empire​

Every 18th February Chetnik Empire has population census. Today census results were published and there were quite a lot of changes is one year. First of all we will take a look at the nominal population growth since last year. Census from 1956 shows that there was 54,829,351 people living in the country. However 1957 census shows 5.4% population growth, in other words there is 57,790,135 people in Chetnik Empire today, that a whole 3 million new to the country. However astonishing this may seem, this growth is actually pretty much normal for Chetnik Empire, 1955-1956 growth was 5,1%.
To address this population boom of Chetnik Empire which is present since the 1920s, before that avarage growth is estimated to be 1,6% in times of communist regime (1902-1912). More important is that the dictator or dictators, of Chetnik Empire after communist regime was put down in 1912 encouraged population growth and so it steadily increased(population growth).
Now in census of religions it can be seen that jewish population gone below 1% and is not counted as "other"(1%), muslim religion was also decreased from 6% to 4%, it all sums up and orthodoxy has risen from 91% to 94%. Some reports say that lot of this muslims were converted to orthodox, while some clash this idea and theorise that its has to do something from population growth. Nonetheless democratic party says that decrease of jewish population is a undeniable proof of prosecution of jews in Chetnik Empire, however dictator denies this theory and says that they changed theyr religion to orthodox. Also some interesting facts about the other non-orthodox christians such as catholics, last catholic church located in city of Bosnia is last non-orthodox church in Chetnik Empire. In 1956 more than 100 non-orthodox churches were closed down. They were pretty much closed down due to decreasing non-orthodox christian population, and non-orthodox christian churches were pretty much empty, and were closed down by themselves and later those churches were re-constructed to orthodox.

Now connected with the subject is question of overpopulation in Chetnik Empire, one of dictators advisors, by the name of Mirko Ljubicic has came here to talk about this. Mirko is also dictators right hand in terms of population "strategies" is we can call it that way.

Mirko: Yes you are definitely right. Overpopulation is right now widely talked by Chetnik population, as every census pases it talked more and more, but often dictator himself speaks up saying "do you believe in god? if you do, stop worrying". Which is true since im religious person. But speaking of the "religious box", we can tell that it could become a concern, but thanks to our capable economy there is nothing to worry its just your neighbor wanting to panic about something cause his bored. Last think i wanna say is, giving birth to children is best way to show that you care about your country and its future, while those who talk about overpopulation do the oposite."

 

[Rheinbund]

Boehrig Ingelheim
Ingelheim, Eiffelland

We have a very nice medication against menstruation disorders for the women of the Chetnik Empire. We can sell it to you for a reasonable price.

OOC: What I'm currently doing, is applying a tactic the Dutch company Organon applied when it brought the contraceptive pill to the market in the 1950s. Many countries were not willing to allow contraception in those days, let alone contraception by means of a tablet. So Organon brought it to the market as a medication against menstruation disorders, with infertility as side-effect. No need to explain that there were suddenly very many women complaining about menstruation disorders; they wanted that pill for birth-control reasons

And an even nicer detail: It were nuns from a near-by monastery who packaged these pills

 

[Јебач]

Public message from dictator to Boehrig Ingelheim

Dictator urgently appears on TV

Dear citizens, we have been astonished by the acts of Eiffellandian company Boehrig Ingelheim. This company sold so called medication against menstruation disorders, this medications were ordered by around 2000 citizens in Chetnik Empire. After all of this happened, the pill seemed to work, however... There was a side-effect. Side effect was infertility. As soon as minster of economy aknowelgd this, he told me about this. Around 400 citizens complained about this side-effect, other 1600 seem to have welcomed the side-effect. I am outraged! How dare you Boehrig Ingel... Ingelheim! You sneaky sodomite snake! Products of this company will be banned from entering Chetnik Empire. Dear citizens we have seen that modern age is getting closer and closer to new age of Sodom. Traditional family values are being disrespected, and those evil led companies, they kill kids! They massacre children in the mothers womb! They call it democracy, freedom, freedom of choice, human rights! Those who came here to search here for normal human-rights are welcome. But those who came to disrespect the Chetnik culture, Christian morales, can turn back and never come back again, but if they do, i promise you Chetniks, they will regret it! They will regret it! We will never allow the seed of Sodom to be planted! We will never accept the Sodomite culture to breath our air!

 

[Rheinbund]

Boehrig Ingelheim
Ingelheim, Eiffelland

We feel the need to stress that we have done nothing wrong. We explicitly mention in the medication leaflet that the side-effect of this medication is infertility. This means that the physicians prescribing this medication and the women taking this medication could have known this side-effect, if they would have read the medication leaflet. We did all the effort we needed to do: The medication leaflets in the medication packages for the Chetnik Empire are even in the local language of the Chetnik Empire, as a result of our internal regulation to always translate the medication leaflets into the local languages of the countries where the medications go to. As a result, medications for Pelasgia are translated into the two languages of Pelasgia, medications for Serenierre and Bourgogne are translated into French, medications for Cumbria are translated into Gaelic, medications for Engellex into English, medications for the Chetnik Empire into the local languages of the Chetnik Empire, and so on. We even use Lauenburger German for the leaflets of the medications going to Lauenburg. And don't blame us for using too small letters; our medication leaflets are perfectly readable for people with a normal visus, as per Eiffellandian legislation.
Therefore, the women who complained about this side-effect could have known about it. It is the task of their physicians to look for a different medication to treat the women's menstruation disorders if the infertility is a problem for these women, but we cannot be blamed for this side-effect, because we mention it in the medication leaflet. It is not our fault, either, if women take our medication for the side-effect instead of the main effect. It is the physician who prescribes the medication, not us.




Aussenministerium
Trier, Eiffelland

We advice the Dictator of the Chetnik Empire to reconsider the ban on products from Boehrig Ingelheim. First of all, it will have a negative impact on the quality of health care if the physicians of the Chetnik Empire will have to cure their patients without the help of the medications from Boehrig Ingelheim. Furthermore, we may consider comparable measures against companies from the Chetnik Empire.

Rudolph Kögler, Minister for Foreign Affairs and Vice-Chancellor

 

[Јебач]

Dictator contacts the Rudolph Kogler via telephone, not directly tough, and call is not encrypted, he calls and gets his secretary

Dictator: Hey, hey... Is that, (in background dictator asks: whats his name again? Someone answers saying: Rudolph Dogleger sir.), yeah the Dogleger guy?

Secretary: We dont know anyone called Dogleger here sir, who is calling?

Dictator: umm...

Secretary: Please sir?

Dictator: Yes, yes im calling yes...

Secretary: Whats your name and surname?

Dictator: Milan Ninkovic!

Secretary: Sir this is not secure line i suggest you...

Dictator: I suggest you to give Dogleger guy! Rudolph Dogleger!

Secretary: You mean Minister for Foreign Affairs? His surname is Kogler.

Dictator: Ohh, sorry im bad with remembering names, i have bad short term memory, however i have 156 IQ so dont think im stupid or something!

Secretary: Dog.. Kogleger is currently busy please call later with safe line.

Dictator: Ugh... You really dont understand? Get that dogleger up his nose and get him in here we have some serious public un-secure telephone call to do.

Secretary: Mr.dictator im really sorry but its not possible right now.

Dictator: Ohh... Ok than but, cause i wont have time later here is what you can do, you can listen to me and tell this to leger guy.

Secretary: Im listening.

Dictator: Mr. Dog... Kogleger. You can do anything, with any Chetnik company you want in your country, i have no problem with that. But do not! I repeat Do not! Do not put comparable measures to the... to the šajkača corporation! If you do we will be forced to close all ties with Eiffieland which also means banning all your companies in here.

Secretary: Is that it?

Dictator: No... Here i want you to write down on paper after message write... Hmm... Hmm... Never matter thats it!

Secretary: Ok i will send this message to him as soon as im able to.

Dictator: Thank you. Also tell him that owner of company is my cousin!

Secretary: Sure. Anything else?

Dictator: No thanks, bye!

-Hangs up-

 

[Јебач]

Mass conscription, military production increasing

​

As dictator announces new mass conscription in the Chetnik Empire, the military production is increasing. In same time there are, i mean were protests in the few cities of Chetnik Empire, and one protest in Ravna Gora. This protests are, i mean were against this new militaristic wave. The protest in Ravna Gora was pretty much standing in front of dictators house, demanding and arguing against this militaristic move. After few minutes of screaming out loudly and protesting (there were around 2k protesters at the start, however later some people joined up and number reached more than 10k, some "propaganda papers" say that there were around 40k), dictator came to the balcony to "oversee this mess". "As dictator entered the balcony, the angry and loud mass, swearing and being rude to dictator became paralised, like its the judgment day...", says one monk. "He stared and oversaw the protesters with his eyes for 3 times, after that he sad with the draconian voice "Why you came here? What do you want? After that one guy sad "Stop this imperialist army building and conscripting! We want peace!". As he sad that more and protesters joined in and they all got on fire again, and starting being rude to dictator, screaming out loud against him" He looked overseen the protesters 7 times this time, and he sad again with his draconian voice "Quiet! I cant think when you are screaming!" It became quiet again, protesters, i could see their faces, they got some hope in their faces, but in same time, they were pralized again. "Your demands are unaccaptable! If anyone listen to such a bunch of idiots like you are, today we would not exist! This is waste of my own and your time. Now of you would quietly go to your homes i may forgive you for your moronic acts." As he sad the last world, protesters walked away slowly away everyone to their own home, like the child who wasnt given a candy by its parent."